first timer..

One of my worries these days is that I will not know that the time has come for me to give birth.

Last Monday right after Subuh prayer I experienced a bleeding, so I went to the hospital. While waiting for the doctor I felt like something was squeezing my belly and letting it go slowly, which I learn from the nurse was actually the contraction. So, I was like "eh dah nak beranak ke aku ni? apa mau bikin?" Hahah..

The doctor came and eventually checked my uterus opening. No opening yet, so the doctor decided to stall my labour. Since the baby is doing well inside, the doctor said it is better to wait until full term, to make sure the baby lungs do ok. (I'm in my 34th weeks, 3 weeks to full term)

I was given medication to fight the contraction. It went well, the contraction lessened, the bleeding stopped and after being warded for a night I was allowed to go back home.

However, on Wednesday night, after midnight actually, I was attacked by a surge of contractions. It came rapidly, first at 10 to 15 minutes then between 4 to 5 minutes, and getting stronger too. At that moment my head felt like exploding thinking on what should I do? What's the right thing to do?  What if it's a false alarm? What if the baby really does want to come out now? Should I wake my husband and go to the hospital now? or should I wait till morning and get myself really, really sure?

At last, if you can believe it, I fell asleep. When I woke up the next Subuh I felt fresh and whole. The contractions had stopped like they never happen. For the whole day yesterday I did not feel any, just regular tightening.

And so comes today. A new day. I don't know what's going to happen today but I pray that my body or my motherly instinct whatever will kick in soon to assure me that I WILL know when it is THE time for me to give birth.. :-p